Ever feel like maybe you don’t know how to love correctly? Like everyone told you having your baby would be the most love you’d ever experience and you get that intellectually, but you feel like something just doesn’t feel right when you’re with them?
The problem is most likely that your heart is closed and closely guarded by walls put up by one or many wounds in your past.
Serious wounds like death, the divorce of your parents, loss of a pet or your house, or cold rejection can even make you lock the door to your heart and throw away the key.
The problem with having a closed heart is that you’ll be unable to know how you really feel so you’ll be unable to access your intuition or your emotions to make the decisions that best serve you or others. As a parent, you’ll be full of anxiety. As a spouse, you’ll feel building resentment as your marriage begins to feel like it no longer serves you. And you’ll have a hard time working with others as you won’t have empathy for yourself – or them.
Intellectually you’ll have empathy — and you may be an empath and feel their pain — but you’ll try to solve their problems in your head rather than feel their experience in your heart. You won’t actually be able to know what they’re going through because you won’t be able to let yourself feel what they’re going through. Empathy is an embodied skill and with a closed heart it’s hard to embody much of anything.
You might be afraid to open your heart because you’re afraid of feeling the pain from your past or your future, but the good news is that once you let that energy move through you, you’ll feel soo much better. Unfelt pain stays with us and manifests as illness. You can sit with the energy of your emotions now and learn from them or you can sit with cancer later.
In this video, I guide you through my heart-opening meditation from my book, The Authentic Wife. You can also listen to Dr. Laura Berman’s heart-opening meditation from her book, Quantum Love, by clicking here.
If you’re really struggling to open your heart, check the basics of self-care like how much sleep you’re getting or how much caffeine you’re taking in. I find these can affect my ability to open my heart. Also, when my energetic boundaries are low I can tend to feel the pain of others as an empath and really struggle to feel like my heart is truly wide open. Take care of yourself first.