Shift #1: Drop Expectations

First, you have to drop your expectations. It sounds counterintuitive, but you have to accept him as the slug he is (for now). Because if you keep expecting him to be different than who he is right now, you’re not going to be able to move on to the next step.

Shift #2: Stop Asking for Help & Move Into Feminine Energy + Planting Seeds

Next, you need to stop asking for help. Instead, you’re going to shift into feminine energy which means that he can feel that you are receptive to help. Men are naturally problem solvers. You’re going to start presenting problems rather than making demands.

Shift #3: Set Expectations With New Routines & Structures and Model the Behavior You Want to See

Finally, you’re going to set expectations and model. So this means that you’re going to start following a routine that he’s aware of beforehand. In my house this looks like 1) we clean up after each meal together, and 2) we clean the house as a family every Saturday morning after breakfast before we do anything else. These simple shifts are predictable, enjoyable, and model everyone taking part to tidy up. Kids thrive on organization, structure, and routine – and if your husband has a touch of or full-blown ADD, he’ll benefit from this as well. Expectations, routines, and structures make us feel safe and comfortable.