Wondering how a broken marriage can be fixed? Or how to fix a marriage that is falling apart?
I remember thinking my husband was a lazy parent or a disappointing father or being worried that he would rather play video games than spend time with me. I thought we were doomed, I knew I couldn’t change him, and I started to think about divorce.
Then a friend told me to buy Quantum Love by relationship expert Dr. Laura Berman and it gave my personal growth journey the boost it needed to get me where I am today. Her book was part of the reason I saved my marriage, wrote my own book The Authentic Wife, and created The Quantum Love Journey to help driven moms save their marriage by using it as the feedback loop or KPI’s to grow in self-awareness and create the relationships they want.
So, what is Quantum Love?
Just like you learn Conscious Parenting, Positive Parenting, or other methods for improving your relationship, Quantum Love is another way of looking at love that strips it of all the harmful conditioning and patterns that got you where you are to begin with.
We’re typically raised with something more like need, dependence, or control which we mistake for love. Our parents show us a transactional model: you do something to make me happy and I’ll show you love… you screw up, and I’ll withdraw it. I’ll even send you to your room or make you cry by hitting you with a belt. That is most assuredly NOT love. That was conditioning, yes the same conditioning you would use to train a dog! The best some of our parents knew how to do was try to train us up with rewards and punishments like we were a German Shepherd joining the K-9 division of the local PD.
Instead, Quantum Love removes all need, dependence, and control from the equation. In fact, we recognize that we chose our partners (subconsciously) FOR their flaws. We chose them because they were a perfect match for us energetically and we must have needed a partnership with them to help us both evolve and grow.
In Quantum Love, we create a relationship field that feels joyful, passionate, and fulfilling.
We accept our partner because of their flaws.
We seek to understand our own.
When we’re having a hard time, we remember that we’re still in harmony together, just temporarily out of tune.
In Quantum Love, we don’t need to focus on anything but what’s going on energetically inside of us. It gives us what we need to understand how to get back to joy again!
We also know that we are already complete. Our partner doesn’t complete us–they might be the motivation to get really close to what we came to this earth to do, but we are whole and complete no matter what happens to them.
I’d love to talk to you about your family. Book a free 30-minute chat with me or click here to read more about using your marriage to grow.
- 40: What Men In Failing Marriages Need To Know - March 19, 2023
- 36: What You Can Do If Your Husband Isn’t On Board With Getting Relationship Help - February 5, 2023
- 35: Helping Kids Manage Their Big Emotions - January 29, 2023